Ill winds doth blow

THE other night, I had the misfortune to spend some time in a pub. For the first hour, the air pollution levels were tolerable, but then somebody lit up a cigar.

The stench was so disgusting that my friend and I were forced to leave.

If I spent the evening in a pub letting off wind, I’d probably get thrown out for anti-social behaviour. The gas in question has an unpleasant odour but, unlike cigarette smoke, it is not poisonous.