'My social worker said I could be her carer and get more money. I told her I’d rather be her mum'

Single mother and full-time carer Ita says 'finance is definitely my biggest challenge' as she is only entitled to half the Carer's Allowance while receiving the Blind Pension

Single mother Ita Carroll, who is deaf and blind, is the full-time carer of her daughter Shellie Chantelle, who has Down syndrome. Picture: Eddie O'Hare

Losing her hearing in an unprovoked attack before gradually turning blind marked just the start of Ita Carroll’s long battle with adversity.

A single mother, she is now the full-time carer to her daughter Shellie — who has Down syndrome. 

Ita says caring for 20-year-old Shellie — which is short for Chantelle — is a joy, and she feels like the luckiest woman alive. 

However, the East Cork woman is keen to highlight what she says is a lack of resources for carers who, in spite of their own disabilities, are committed to looking after their loved ones. 

As she receives a State pension because she is blind, Ita is only entitled to half the Carer's Allowance. 

Ita's first challenge in life came when she lost her hearing during an attack in London. Then, working in Cumbria as a fashion designer, Ita was robbed of her sight by the unrelated condition — retinitis pigmentosa.

The 61-year-old mother of four was fitted with cochlear implants in 2010 and continues to adapt to life without sight.

“I’m positive and that’s what keeps me resilient,” Ita told the Irish Examiner.

My father used to say that he had nine children, and I was the strongest of them all

"That was 30 years ago, when I only had two daughters. Shellie is the youngest of four girls.

"Some people can’t figure out why I’m so upbeat, but the only way you can survive in this world is to stay positive. Everyone has a disability, it’s just that some are more noticeable than others. 

"Feeling sorry for yourself isn’t going to get you anywhere. I feel lucky because I have a daughter who loves me unconditionally and that says a lot. Anyone can be a good carer if they love the person they are caring for.” 

Ita chose not to apply for the Carer's Allowance until Shellie was a teenager. 

Ita Carroll says she receives €118 a week under the Blind Pension, meaning she can only get half  of the Carer's Allowance for daughter Shellie. Picture: Eddie O'Hare

“My social worker said I could be her carer and get more money. I told her I’d rather be her mum," Ita said.

"She was trying to convince me that I would always be her mother. However, it felt like the moment I started being Shellie's carer I would stop being her mum. 

"After I became a single mum we were closer than ever. I didn’t apply for the Carer’s Allowance until she was 16. 

I felt like she was getting more independent, but everything was also costing more money because she was at the stage where she wanted and needed things

"I knew that, if I had the Carer’s Allowance, I could give her those things. I decided to grab whatever I could to help Chantelle with open arms.”

She is keen to see more support and recognition for carers like herself. 

The Ballinacurra local says she receives €118 a week under the Blind Pension — a means-tested payment for people living with blindness or limited sight.

However, because she receives that pension, she is only entitled to half of the Carer's Allowance

“I only get half the amount of Carer’s Allowance because I am on the Blind Pension. This is despite all the challenges. 

"I can’t work and mind Shellie. She also doesn’t have a medical card, which increases the costs. I also can’t let just anyone mind her. It’s not possible. 

"Finance is definitely my biggest challenge. I also have to keep Chantelle very close to me, because she doesn’t see the danger in people. She would gladly walk away with a stranger, and I often have to remind her that you only hug your family. 

“Every year, we get an assessment done to see if we still qualify for the payment — which I can never understand because it’s not like Shellie is going to wake up in the morning and no longer have Down syndrome.” 

Proving herself as a capable carer is extremely important to Ita.

“You need a lot of support, but I don’t ask for it because I don’t want anyone to think I can’t cope. I can be down in the dumps at times, but Shellie always changes this as soon as she comes in the door. Sometimes, I’m not sure who the true carer really is.” 

Ita and her daughter enjoy finding time for mother-daughter activities. Picture: Eddie O'Hare

Ita says the pair share a special friendship.

“Chantelle is a pure blessing. I tell her every night I would love to be like her. I tell her she is understanding, helpful, but most of all she is so affectionate. We hug each other every night," Ita said.

"She is beautiful both inside and out. People think it must be hard to be a carer when you have a disability, but we communicate through love.” 

Ita and her daughter enjoy finding time for mother-daughter activities and are proud members of Cork’s Cycling for All initiative.

The organisation allows people with disabilities to enjoy cycling with the help of tandem bike pilots

“Mark O’Donoghue, who heads the project, changed our lives. I call him a gentle giant. We always feel very safe and happy around him," Ita explained.

"I never thought that I’d get to experience Shellie riding a bike for the first time, but Mark and Jerry — also a member of Cycling for All — made that happen.” 

Ita says her and her daughter grow closer with each day.

“She understands and worries about me a lot. Even when I fell off one of the bikes, she was trying to tell me not to dress her bed for her because of my sore hand. When Chantelle is safe and happy, I know I can relax. This is by far my biggest achievement in life.”

• Carer's week run until Sunday, June 16. Visit www.carersweek.ie for details.