'I lost my relationship with my mother, my sister, and my brother', woman abused by her father tells court

Defendant, who denied the charges, was convicted by unanimous jury decisions on 11 counts of sexually assaulting his then 17-year-old daughter and has now been jailed

Judge imposed a sentence of four and a half years on the defendant, with the last nine months suspended. Picture: Larry Cummins

A teenager challenged her own father about sexually abusing her and she recorded the conversation in which he said: “OK, I won’t cuddle you anymore”, and she replied: “It’s not just f***ing cuddling”.

This recording became part of the evidence in the case against the 50-year-old man, who denied committing any sexual assaults. 

After a trial by judge and jury, he was convicted by unanimous jury decisions on 11 counts of sexually assaulting his 17-year-old daughter.

Detective Garda Rachel McGrath, who investigated the case, said between May 1 and June 6 2023, said the injured party testified her father pinched her bottom eight times, he touched her breasts outside her clothing once and under her clothing once, and he lay on top of her on her bed when they were fully clothed and rubbed his erect penis against her vaginal area and asked her if she was wet.

Judge Sinéad Behan imposed a sentence of four and a half years on the defendant, with the last nine months suspended. The judge said the courage and resilience shown by the injured party was inspiring, and she noted she did not want to be defined as a victim.

The young woman, who is now 20, said on Tuesday: “What happened to me did not simply end when the abuse ended. Its consequences followed me through my teenage years and into adulthood. They have affected my family relationships, my confidence, my sense of safety and the way I have learned to navigate the world.

“I lost so much more than just the childhood I should have had. I lost relationships, a sense of family and the security of knowing that the people who were supposed to protect and love me would always be there. 

"I lost my relationship with my mother, my sister, and my brother. These were people who should have been part of my everyday life. People I should have been able to turn to, grow up alongside and share life's experiences with.

“Losing my relationship with my mother has been particularly painful. A mother should be someone you can turn to for protection, comfort, and unconditional love. Having to navigate such difficult experiences without feeling that support from my own mother has left a hurt that is incredibly difficult to explain.

“I do, however, recognise how fortunate I have been to have my aunt and uncle. They rallied around me when I needed people most. They stood by me, supported me and showed me love.

“I was a child who deserved to feel safe, protected and loved. I deserved a childhood free from fear. I deserved to grow up without having to learn how to rebuild myself from experiences that were never my fault. I am now working towards giving myself the life that little girl always deserved.

“I am proud of the person I am, proud of how far I have come and determined not to let what happened dictate the rest of my life. I cannot give that little girl back the childhood she deserved, but I can give the young woman I am today the future she deserves. 

"I am not defined by what was done to me. I am defined by the person I have fought so hard to become. I am still here. I am still fighting. And I am still building the life I deserve.”