Padraic sells his van so he can afford an iPad

Who says there’s no such thing as bad publicity? An amusing advert placed on the Irish website DoneDeal proves the point.

In what reads like a script from Pat Shortt, Padraic, the advertiser, wants to offload a somewhat distressed van for something in the region of €650 so he can buy an iPad.

All the details are there: 1996 Volkswagen Transporter with 160,000 miles, diesel engine. Price: €650.

Padraic certainly has a way with words, telling would-be purchasers that although the van is going well, it may take more than a little TLC to put her on the road.

As he puts it: “She’s in great running order but ‘The Man’ says I need some paperwork to put her on the road. She needs a bit of love to get her through the DOE but I may as well be looking at a cow’s arse as trying to fix her myself and I haven’t a notion of paying a mechanic to do it.

“The last owner stuck four alloys off a Landrover on it for some mad reason, suppose he thought it would make her go faster or something. I don’t get it myself, each to their own.”

Padraic informs us that “the inside in the back is painted with anti-bacterial paint (whatever that is). Handy if you want to convert it to an ambulance or transport organs.”

He urges anybody interested to give him a shout.

“Make some kind of offer. I’m saving up for an iPad with all the bells and whistles so could do with a few quid. The nephew had one, they’re some job in fairness.

“Offers accepted but Jaysus lads ye better be standing in front of me with a big wad of cash when ye do it.”

* http://www.donedeal.ie/commercials-for-sale/vw-transporter/6237810