HARD LUCK WOMAN

* Even in a world without heroes, it’s a crazy, crazy night when Mary O’Rourke’s posters get a Kiss makeover. Tears are falling!

ENDA OFF THE HOOK

* Newstalk’s “Get the news without the State-run spin” advertising campaign was recently turned down by RTÉ. Now we wonder if the slogan can survive the election results next weekend after the station’s drivetime lynchpin George Hook attended the Fine Gael rally in the Aviva Stadium yesterday and sung the praises of Taoiseach-in-waiting Enda Kenny.

Mind you, with George’s show losing 5,000 listeners according to the latest JNLR survey, perhaps he’s hoping Enda will reconsider abolishing the Senate and instead reward him with a seat in it.

THE MORE THINGS CHANGE

* Micheál Martin, General Election leaflet… 1987: “Dear Voter… Reflect on 250,000 unemployed, 100,000 emigrants, hundreds of thousands in poverty. Ask yourself; do I want another unstable coalition government?

“Ireland is very much a land of youth. It is sad, therefore, to see the young leaving us. They go in search of work that they should have at home. It is our duty to give them the work that will keep them in this country. Your vote will count in this tremendous task. Your vote will matter if you help elect a government ready, willing and able to take on this task.”

SPIT OF HIM

* Wicklow Fine Gael candidate Simon Harris might be fired up, but can we truly rely on a man who was clearly separated at birth from Alf Stewart’s rogue son Duncan? After all, the last time Home & Away bad boy Duncan lived in Summer Bay, he got fired up on drugs and drove a car off a cliff. What do you mean he sounds like ministerial material?

VOTE EARLY, VOTE OFTEN

* ‘One man, one vote’, the emotional call to arms behind demands for suffrage the world over. Except in Kerry, where they always tend to do the dog on things. Here’s Tara Egan from Ross Road, Killarney with her two polling cards, for different polling stations in the same town.

TWEET RELIEF

* As if the daunting contest for a seat in Cork South-Central wasn’t hot enough, posters on Barrack Street, Cork, suggest Dan Boyle also faces stiff competition as the city’s Twitter king.

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