Gen Z Diary: The longer I let it go on, the harder it becomes to just text back

Jane Cowan: "Often when I see that someone has texted me, I will make a mental note to get back to them soon. Like folding my laundry, it feels more efficient to respond to multiple people’s texts in one go."

One unfortunate thing about this earthly existence is that it often involves doing things you don’t particularly feel like doing in the moment. Changing the sheets on your bed or folding your laundry or whatever it is.

Unfortunately, though, these things have to be dealt with eventually. You can’t put off folding that laundry forever. But if you’re
anything like me, it might take a few clean loads piling up to kick you into gear and get it folded and put away.

I always feel I am more efficient when I’m under pressure to get something done. So, folding three loads of laundry in one go feels
perfectly reasonable to me. I know I’m not alone in this outlook. We all like to procrastinate at times. And when it’s an actual chore, procrastinating makes a lot of sense.

Though procrastination is an
affliction that humans of every age tend to share, I have noticed a trend in the things that my generation likes to put off. For us, things that feel like a chore stretch beyond the laundry basket. In particular, I’ve observed that my generation also likes to procrastinate when it comes to responding to texts.

I am not proud to say that I have become increasingly guilty of this offence over the years. I’m not
saying this in an ‘I am too popular for my own good, and my life is so hard’ kind of way (though I am, and it is). I am just being honest about my flaws. When someone texts me, even if it is a very close friend or family member that I genuinely like talking to, I will often put off responding.

I know most of my friends do the same thing from time to time. I feel like a task has been added to my to-do list. And it’s not an easy mindset to shake.

Jane Cowan: "You can’t put off folding that laundry forever. But if you’re anything like me, it might take a few clean loads piling up, to kick you into gear and get it folded and put away."

The process goes something like this. Often when I see that someone has texted me, I will make a mental note to get back to them soon. Like folding my laundry, it feels more efficient to respond to multiple people’s texts in one go.

Then, all of a sudden, days have passed. And I have not managed to get back to them in a timely manner. Now, I feel rude. And I know that there’s not much of an excuse for my sudden falling off the face of the earth.

So, my very logical solution to this is putting off the problem a little longer. I will start drafting the text in my head and I will get a little more stressed every time I look at my WhatsApp or iMessage and see the number of notifications steadily increasing. And for some reason unknown to myself, I continue to do it. The longer I let this go on, the harder it becomes to just bloody text back. It makes no sense, but here we are.

It doesn’t help that I am part of a generation that takes being left on delivered for prolonged periods as an insult. We know that we’re
always on our phones, so if someone my age hasn’t replied, we’ll never assume that it’s because they haven’t seen the notification. We’ll always assume that you’re just enjoying some Instagram scrolling too much to respond.

I know it shouldn’t really be a problem to not respond to a text for a little while. Just because we have phones doesn’t mean we need to be immediately accessible at all hours of the day. But as our virtual and actual lives become more enmeshed, missing a text message can feel personal.

I think that’s why so many people my age will procrastinate responding to texts, even from our friends. If you see another WhatsApp message add itself to the pile of people you need to get back to, it’s no wonder our instinct might be to ignore the problem. It feels less like an opportunity to connect with friends, and more like your to-do list has just had a task added to it.

And like every other bad habit, my self-awareness has done little to curb the issue. I still have a shameful number of messages to respond to as I type this. The only solace I find is in telling myself that I’m just raging against the machine and not giving big tech what it wants, every time I ignore a notification. I don’t know.

All I can say is that the habit is not a mark against the people I’m not responding to. I am the problem. And I know I should just fold my laundry as soon as it is ready to be folded.