Gen Z Diary: Anyone using Snapchat in their 20s needs to take a long, hard look at themselves

Jane Cowan: 'In the moment, I wanted to shake the guy and tell him that he was jeopardising any future romance by asking girls for their Snapchat.' Picture: Thomas Trutschel/Photothek

There’s nothing more humbling than walking into a nightclub and realising that you are your friends are the oldest people in the crowd. It seems ridiculous to say it that at 22, but 18-year-olds genuinely view us as ancient monuments.

They’ll say hurtful things like: “Wait…no way, you don’t look 22”, and smile like they’ve just made the OAP on the dancefloor feel better about herself. I get it, I used to look at people who had finished college as these fully formed beings, so mature and world-wise. I can confirm, being at this stage of life is not as glamorous as I had pictured it being, as a gentle teen. It’s less martinis and contributing to your pension, more struggling to keep tabs on which country each of your friends is moving to.

I often think that I am no different than a teen, and then I talk to one and realise how desperately uncool I have become over the years. The disjunction is glaring when I walk into the wrong nightclub, yes. But nothing will make me feel my age as much as my relationship with social media. I am now at an age where it feels wrong to be using certain social media platforms.

For instance, I think that anyone actively using Snapchat in their 20s needs to take a long, hard look at themselves. Snapchat is social media for teens. And anyone over the age of 20 should probably be booted off it and told to apply for a mortgage or something. Disappearing messages, streaks, and snap scores? Those aren’t for us.

Look, maybe it’s okay to continue to text friends that you’ve had on the app since you were in school. But if you’re actively increasing the number of friends you have on Snapchat in your 20s, I have some questions.

Firstly, are you doing okay? Secondly, are you aware that you can use WhatsApp? Thirdly, is anyone actually adding you back on there?

Honestly, if a guy at a bar asked me for my Snapchat username instead of my phone number, I would probably assume that he is trying to traffic me. 

Because really and truly, I can’t think of any other scenario that would justify someone in their 20s using Snapchat. What’s next, a game of tip the can in the club? Spin the bottle at your 21st birthday party?

A few months ago, I was asked for my Snapchat username by someone apparently trying to woo me. At first, I genuinely thought it was a joke. Because I’m simply too haggard to be keeping up a Snapchat streak at my age. I felt I needed to ask this boy to show me an ID. I was ready to offer to call his mother to collect him. The idea of receiving a Snap from an adult man is borderline nauseating. I would rather be asked on a first date to McDonald’s.

In the moment, I wanted to shake the guy and tell him that he was jeopardising any future romance by asking girls for their Snapchat. 

Do you not have a phone number, Sir? Look, maybe that move works on some women, and who am I to judge?

But if I could offer insight into the minds of girls in their 20s, I would tell you that most girls consider Snapchat a serious red flag. Once you hit college, you graduate to WhatsApp and iMessage, whether you like it or not. At a push, I’ll allow an Instagram DM. But that’s where I’m drawing the line. You’ve got to get with the programme. I’m not saying you have to delete Snapchat today. But if you’re of university age, you’ve got to be phasing it out, at the very least.

I get it, for many of us, Snapchat was the first form of social media we had. It is the only way I texted most of the friends I made during secondary school. But now, it is a source of nostalgia for me, nothing more. I say all of this with love. Old habits, and all that. But just like the first time your mother made you learn to use the washing machine, you can’t fight it.

We’re not teens anymore. It is an existential question we must all reckon with at some point, how old is too old for Snapchat? I would argue that when people in nightclubs start to tell you that you look great for your age, you’ve reached that point. It’s WhatsApp time.