Ask Audrey: My friends started calling my husband Gouger after I told them he only went to Coláiste Chríost Rí

Sorting out Cork people for ages...

Ask Audrey has been sorting Cork people out for ages.

It’s getting arty on our WhatsApp group Douglas Road Stunners Who Could Write a Bestselling Novel if We Only Had The Time. Fifi_HonoursEnglish said she was knocked out by a bug last week and took the bedtime to write the first chapter of a novel about a group of really good-looking women from one of the best roads in Cork who have a falling out when one of them sleeps with another one’s husband on a skiing holiday. Scenes! 

We’re all just back from the annual Douglas Road Ski Slopers trip to a really exclusive part of the Italian Alps, you couldn’t afford it, and we’re all going mad trying to figure out who slept with whom, because Fifi_HonoursEnglish never had an original thought in her life, so she must know something. I cornered my Ken last night and put him on the spot by directly accusing him of sleeping with one of my friends in Italy and he told me that he’d rather lick the road in Togher than sleep with any of my friends.