This Much I Know: 'Take the chances' - author Jo Spain

The bestselling author and screenwriter on mortality, taking chances, and growing up in north Dublin

Jo Spain's latest novel The Perfect Lie is out now.

My family are Dubliners through and through. I remember going to Donegal with my husband before and being shocked at how dark it was. I grew up in a one-class estate in Coolock and my family are all from Beaumont and Whitehall. They're very down to earth, funny, gritty people. They definitely influenced me in terms of character development and stories because they're just so brutally honest.

From an early age, I was writing creatively and I had teachers who really supported it. I was doing poems and stories for school magazines and I was reading all of the time. When other children were out playing I was just reading books over and over. Nobody was surprised when I wrote my first book, but it wasn’t normal to do this kind of job where I grew up.

Very few of the people I went to school with went on to college, let alone into careers that are as unusual as this. I think the biggest challenge I've faced was probably going to Trinity College. I had one uncle in my entire family that went there. No one else that I knew, no friends, nobody in my neighbourhood, had gone there. At the time it was 1998 and the percentages from my area going to Trinity were negligible.

When I was there I didn't know that I was from somewhere different but when I look back, it was very unusual. I recognise it as an achievement now more so than I did at the time. My proudest achievement though is my four children. I have two girls and two boys. They're healthy and happy and loved and I think that's the best thing I've done.

My greatest quality is that I have the patience of a saint. I don't think you could work in the business that I do otherwise. I do encounter some people who are led by ego but I find I'm very patient. It pays in the long run because you're known as an easy person to work with. It's not about letting people walk all over you but you do have to allow for collaboration. If you don't have patience you can fall out with people all the time in the creative industry.

The person I turn to most is my husband. He's my best friend. We've been together for 18 years and married for 15. At the end of the day if anything is going wrong he's the person I vent it all out to. That's probably what allows me to be patient with everybody else.

I also have really strong willpower. I run an awful lot and I'm not the best at it but I'm really good at making myself get out in the rain. Sometimes when I'm in the middle of a project and it's horrifically stressful, I will still get through it on the sheer force of willpower.

I think I'd like to be remembered for being loved and loving. I think that's more important than anything I ever do with my career. I would just like people to remember me as a nice person.

What I'd say to others is that if you think you can do something do it. If you think you can write a book, or learn to play an instrument, or you want to have a lead part in a play, just do it. I decided to write a book one day and it completely changed the course of my life. Only you have the power to do something that you're dreaming about.

I turned 41 last year and was thinking about how life just flies. You really have to just take the chances if you think you can do something different with your life, or career, or if you want to emigrate somewhere. If you don't do it yourself, it won't happen.

The greatest advice I have ever been given was not to put anything in writing unless you've really thought about it. I have an aunt and she said to me once that if you put something in black and white it can always be brought back up. I know it sounds strange for a writer to say that but it is very true.

I'm most scared of people I love dying and I know that comes from burying my dad when I was 16 and my stepdad when he was 58. I know what mortality is and how easy it can come to people. I don't think people who haven't lost anyone that close to them realise how fleeting life can be. It worries me all the time. Life is so fragile.

My dad was a musician and I really liked music and I think if I took a different fork in the road I might have done it properly. I got a piano a couple of years ago and started to teach myself and it does come naturally to me. I'm really enjoying it. I think I got his genes. Maybe if I wasn't writing screenplays I could have been scoring screenplays.

The Perfect Lie by Jo Spain is out now