First Dates Ireland: Five best bits from this year's series
We round up some of the best bits from this season of First Dates Ireland
From bigamous husbands, to broken penises, first same-sex dates and the first First Dates Ireland engagement — series seven has been a wild ride. As the show concludes with its best-of episode, we round up five of the most memorable moments from the 2022 season.
We couldn’t have rounded up the series' most memorable moments without this one. There were many strange first-date topics of conversation this year — daters opened up to their blind dates about everything from cancer diagnosis' and alcoholism, to suicidal ideation and debating not going on the date due to being on their period. But what really took the biscuit was Jordan from Limerick who told his blind date about breaking his “banjo string” recently.
"We were doing the thing, we were doing sex, and she decided to pull it the whole way down and she snapped my banjo string," he told a speechless Sasha.
"She managed to basically rip my foreskin in half. Half of it was on and half of it was hanging off... I was screaming in pain and I lost a lot of blood, it was like a water gun, spraying all over the place."
At this point, we think Sasha has lost her appetite, but he keeps going, confessing that he rang his mam along with an ambulance and divulged the details straight away — but he was embarrassed that his aunt, who is a paramedic in the local hospital, might be assigned to his case.
“Wow,” Sasha says. “Wow … wow.” At the end of the night, we're mildly shocked that Sasha says she's up for more drinks... to be fair, Jordan had reassured her that everything was now working again down below. Ahem.
There were lots of Corkonians on the seventh series of First Dates Ireland, including Miss Cork Zoe who forgot her date’s name and Maria who had any chance of a second date supered when she revealed to her Dublin date she was from Midleton. But one of the most awkward moments of the series was the date between two Rebellers, Hayley and Evan. The Ballincollig lady comes on the show saying she is looking for someone who can keep their eyes on her “and off the menu.”
Evan seems up to the task, keeping her chatting and later telling the producers he fancies her and would up for another date. But by the end of the night, it seems that it’s Hayley who can’t keep her eyes off the menu, admitting she isn’t sure she actually wants to hang around for a relationship because she wants to go travelling. In the end, it’s a no from her to a second date but she says she is open to friendship. “I am not really looking for a friend at the moment,” Evan replies bluntly. Awkward.
There were a few moments this season that nearly left us speechless. Like Eucilene’s story about her husband going on a solo trip back home — and marrying another woman while there. There was also that moment last week where James remarked that his date might have been inspired to “change a few things” after his rejection of her — wince. But one moment that left us speechless in a good way was Ashling and Mervyn's date. Upon meeting, there’s a moment of silence between the pair, both from Kilkenny. For a second, viewers don’t know what’s going on.
“I don’t know what to say,” Ashling says. “It’s a small world,” Mervyn mutters. It turns out, the pair sat beside each other for FIVE years in school. They reminisce on old times (Mervyn was a bit of a stud it seems), and catch-up on their lives now (Ashling is now a hit on TikTok, while Mervyn is a widowed father of five). At the end of the night, it’s a yes to a second date for both of them. “She hasn’t really changed.. she’s still the same Ashling," Mervyn says. Swoon.
We're used to awkward dates and awkward endings on First Dates, but Aran and Kirsty's ending might go down as the most awkward in the history of the programme. Aran enters The Gibson Hotel looking for a girl with “nice legs, nice bum, nice teeth, nice eyes” — no mention of whether she needs to have a personality. He's paired up with Kirsty from Dungarvan who is looking for someone "different." The two don’t exactly spark a match initially — when Aran asks what’s the end goal Kirsty remarks dispassionately “dessert.” Then, there's the toe-curling moment when Aran says he's looking for a girlfriend before he gets "too famous" and treats First Dates viewers to a sample of his music — “I am sittin in the First Dates chair, I am looking for a bird to give the ware, and maybe take her home to meet me mother, then I get her to the bed and make her fanny flutter."
We were already squirming, but it got worse. Before Kirsty sits down for the all-important 'would you like to see each other again romantically' question, Aran tells the camera she’s not his type and he doesn’t want to see her again. But, when the two of them are seated beside one another he encourages Kirsty to go first and lets her say she’d go for another date. When he very unconvincingly also says he’d see her again, the lady behind the camera prompts him to admit he just said no…
"I think I was right with my initial instinct about him," Kirsty says when he's left the room. "I knew what he was like. I could tell straight away that he was full of shit." We hope Aran didn't go on Twitter after the show aired.
We love the awkward bits, the mismatches, the moments where we’re screaming ‘WHY’ at the TV... but most of all, we love when First Dates Ireland gets it oh so right. And this season, well, there was a lot of those moments. Some of our favourite pairings included Donegal romantic Jay and hard-to-impress Alan from Monaghen (who are now in a relationship), adoptees Peter from Galway and Limerick lady Grace, and Jamie from Cork who impressed both viewers and Tara from Limerick. But the moment that really got us was when gym rat Tim from Meath and model Lauren from Cork were asked whether they wanted a second date. Tim, who opened up about being bullied at school and being voted ‘most likely to be a virgin for life’ at his Debs, immediately says yes but it’s obvious he isn’t expecting Lauren to say the same. When she does, he responds “Really?” in astonishment, looking like the cat who got the cream. Too cute.
