Ask Audrey: How to sort out Norries in your back yard

My cousin has his ear to the ground on the real estate scene around town.

Hi girl. I do be living in Douglas at the moment as part of a reality show on whatever they call TV3 these days. It’s called NIMBY, Norries in My Back Yard, where they put a northsider in with a bunch of nobs and see how long before they accuse me of stealing. I’m game ball so far because I do be good at accents and have them fooled into thinking I’m one of their own. (I hired a white Range Rover and keep saying ‘I can’t wait for Crook’, that’s what they call Crookhaven.) Is there anything that might give me away? May, Douglas, I could get used to this.

This is definitely one for the Posh Cousin. I said, is there any dead give away that will expose a Norry living undercover in Douglas? She said, cleaning your own house. I said, hilaire. She said, there must be a name for that. I said, you mean what do you call a dead common one pretending to be posh? She said, the Duchess of Sussex. #PoshCousinOnFire!