'My niece did a degree in Gender Studies - her father cried for three months'

I’m part of a very exclusive group on WhatsApp called Montenotte Women in Volvos Who Only Eat Vegan Food Made by Rich Protestants. #Elite. Yesterday, one of six Rachels in the group posted that her daughter, Beatrice, was watching an innocent video on YouTube when it was suddenly interrupted by this terrifying Norry called MamMam, who said: “C’mere girl, you do be perfect for the majorettes.”

Now, I’m not sure I can trust this Rachel, she’s a bit of a tit to be honest. But if she is telling the truth, this is an appalling threat to the children of Posh Cork. How can I check if it’s legit?