Sex File: New boyfriend’s post-coital gratitude is a turn-off

My new boyfriend is lovely, but painfully polite — and his excessive consideration even extends to the bedroom. He says thank you after sex. I know he means well, but I find it terribly deflating, not to mention a huge turn-off.

I know what you mean about being thanked after sex. It has slightly transactional overtones that feel out of place in the bedroom. We thank people who serve us, or sell us things, or hold the door open for us, but we don’t tend to say thank you to the people we have sex with.