Sex advice with Suzi Godson: How assertive and honest should I be in the bedroom?

Suzi Godson offers more advice...

My last two boyfriends have reacted very differently when I give them instructions as to what I like. I am naturally quite assertive, but I get the impression from my current boyfriend that I might be a bit too prescriptive with my instructions. I just know what I enjoy.

Unless you are handing your partner an advance checklist and barking step-by-step instructions through a megaphone, you do not need to apologise for being explicit about what you enjoy. You sound like a naturally assertive woman, so why would you, or your boyfriend, expect your sexual behaviour to be any different? The way we interact sexually is an extension of who we are as people so, for example, extroverts tend to be more sexually adventurous and have more partners, whereas people who are very conservative will limit the number of people they have sex with and what they do with them.