Book review: Holy Cow

Holy Cow is no Hank Moody novel, nor a Fox Mulder conspiracy; it resembles nothing of David Duchovny’s famous characters. Instead, it’s a wholly unique “dairy tale” (if that makes you wince, it’s not for you at all) about Elsie Q, a cow who flees the farm after witnessing industrial slaughter on TV.

Elsie is a distinct narrator: speaking in the cutting-edge teenage-speak of OMGs and amazeballs, she’s not averse to postmodern asides to the reader signposting cliffhangers, jokes or relating her editor’s reluctance for the book to tackle big issues.

And the issues come thick and fast on a breezy global adventure that loudly extols the virtues of being kind and compassionate, reaching an improbable peak with a pig who (briefly) unites Israelis and Palestinians.

With that madcap-and-moralising tone, you need a good wit to get you through and Duchovny’s carries you through the preachy parts to deliver a fun and diverting tale.