Fear factor

It is important to reassure children of their safety. Informing them of danger is a balancing act.

The tragic abduction of April Jones in Wales last week has featured in news headlines around the world. The disappearance of the five-year-old is every parent’s worst nightmare and, while there was precious little anyone could have done to prevent this, it has left many people wondering how to inform children of danger without making them too scared to leave the house. Child and family psychologist, Peadar Maxwell, says it is important to reassure children of their safety.

“There’s no hiding from the sad tragedy of April Jones,” he says. “Most primary and secondary aged children will be aware of the horrifying story even if they are not talking about it.

“If you know your child is following the story talk to them about it, and sit with them if they watch the news on TV.

“Ask them what they are thinking and feeling. Remind your child that the world is safe and that to keep it that way you mind your child; you know where he is and who he is with.

“I don’t recommend over-exposure of young children to the stream of bad news we get everyday be it the abduction of April, the recession or wars around the world. Children come to understand our vast world in little bites of information with the guidance of their parents.

“But it would also be a mistake to think that pretending the world is Disneyland is helpful to your curious child. Talking about what we hear on the car radio on the way to the shops or breaking news that appears on your screens between shows can help inform your child, reassure him and give you a chance to share your opinions and values.”

Psychologist Dr David Carey believes that parents should keep their children away from tragic news stories and only impart information if and when it is required.

“It is generally not advisable to tell children about things such as child abduction unless they ask questions,” he says.

“Then questions should be taken literally and answered in a way the child can understand. Talking to children at length about these matters can cause upset and distress.

“Some children are especially susceptible to becoming fearful and anxious and bringing these subjects up without any context has the potential to be harmful to them.

“But if it is necessary to communicate news of tragic events to children it should be done with their developmental level in mind and be concise and to the point.

“Always ask if the child has questions. Tell them they can come and talk about it any time with you. Be present and be available.

“It is often more important to listen to the child than to talk to them.”