Imagine if a barely literate Ned Flanders climbed through your window and got his hands on your books. Your literature, your novels, your classics, your memoirs, your contemporary fiction, your cult titles.

I am so furious at my sunglasses I could splinter them into a million tiny pieces, writes Suzanne Harrington.

AND so to the Bishop of Elphin, and his pronouncements on rape, parenting, and homosexuality, writes Suzanne Harrington.

Love him or hate him, Jeremy Clarkson’s disdain for anything remotely PC was a cash cow for the BBC. So even if the Beeb do dump him, he’ll be snapped up says Suzanne Harrington

MY grandmother, who died many years ago, was fond of saying that she had lived too long.

THE lovely people at Penguin sent a book about the Roman philosopher, Seneca, written by a professor of classics, Emily Wilson.

BEFORE you go to see Fifty Shades of Grey, you must enter into a contract. The contract is between the film dominating cinemas everywhere, and the audience submitting two hours and five minutes of their lives which they will never get back.

Apparently my man and I are very modern. It’s nothing personal, it’s just that we are one of those new-fangled LAT couples.

WORKING from home means a lot of time to stare distractedly out the window, wondering why you are here, what your purpose is, and whether your team will get out of the relegation zone before it’s too late.

Suzanne Harrington asks whose genius idea was it to cut children’s books while still funding animal suffering?