I’m especially good at expectorating, sings Gaston in Beauty and the Beast, and the hunter’s skill with a well-aimed spit is just one more indication that he’s the villain of the piece.

A friend from another media outlet was at Murrayfield for the Ireland-Scotland game a couple of weeks ago, and was surprised to hear a prominent Irish player declare, in the wake of the dismal defeat, that the men in green were “in a good place”.

At the end of last year this column took up the cudgels again in the GAA statistics battle, invoking Jorge Luis Borges in an effort to stimulate the debate.

Everything revolved around his thumb.

The sideline regulation controversy is not an obsession for this corner of the newspaper — not just yet anyway — but the matter continues to raise questions, despite Croke Park’s keenness to draw a line under the matter.

We are all part of the same hypocrisy, said Michael Corleone in The Godfather (Part Two).

Psychiatrist to make calls on match ‘fitness’

It started as a chat about Dr Crokes’ chances in the All-Ireland club semi-final against Ballymun Kickhams, but that only turned the key in the ignition. Pat O’Shea took us on a tour of coaching ideas.

If there’s one town in Ireland where I would want my car to break down, it’s Dungarvan.

Sideline scrum now the bane of rugby