I FEEL dirty. I was on one of those websites. You know, the ones with the photographs of the different models. Lurid claims about performance were splashed all over the pages and it was clear a lot of them had work done. Everything is for sale and there is much hyperbole. After all, most cars have alloy wheels.

POOR oul’ Marie Elisa Bullot. She was just in the wrong place at the wrong time. Or rather she was placed somewhere that over time eventually became wrong.

I’m exhausted just watching it.

ALBERT REYNOLDS said they tripped you up, while One Direction reckoned “it’s you they add up to”. I’m talking about the little things.

They are already in tatters.

I SAY a little aggressive passive-agressively, “So is it this exit?”.

THE New Year: when a local authority’s thoughts turn to ... “I wonder how old this area is anyway. Maybe there’s an anniversary coming up”.

January

AND so this is Christmas, and what have you done? “NOT A THING” says you, “I thought I had more time”.

A small tingle of pride ran across my neck when I heard the news.