‘Sad Grandpa’ turns to Saturday Night Live for votes

JOHN MCCAIN flogged campaign merchandise on a shopping channel to bolster his advertising budget and pleaded with voters to fulfil his presidential dream before he dies.

But his tongue was rooted firmly in his cheek and his comments were sandwiched between his delivery of the most recognisable catchline on American television, “Live from New York, it’s Saturday Night”.

After two months when he was derided for being grumpy, McCain anchored NBC’s Saturday Night Live alongside Tina Fey, the comic who parodies Sarah Palin.

Mocking his own limitations in fundraising, McCain moaned he could not afford the advertising spend of Barack Obama, so had turned to the shopping channels instead.

“This past Wednesday, Barack Obama purchased airtime on three major networks. We, however, can only afford QVC.

“Would I rather be on three major networks? Of course. But I am a true maverick, a Republican without money,” he said.

McCain was on stage with Fey and his wife Cindy showcasing political Joe action figures — Joe the Plumber, Joe Sixpack and Joe Biden, Obama’s running mate.

McCain’s wife, Cindy, briefly appeared to advertise “McCain Fine-Gold” jewellery, a play on the campaign finance law McCain authored with Wisconsin Democratic Sen Russ Feingold.

Later in the show McCain returned to discuss a last-ditch strategy for manipulating his self-described maverick image.

One option he considered was, at 72 years of age, to look for the sympathy vote as the “Sad Grandpa”.

“That’s where I get on TV and go, ‘Come on, Obama’s gonna have plenty of chances to be president. It’s my turn’,” he said.

McCain also announced two other possible strategies.

“I thought I might try a strategy called the reverse maverick. That’s where I’d do whatever anybody tells me,” McCain said.

And if that didn’t work, “I’d go to the double maverick. I’d just go totally berserk and freak everybody out,” the Arizona senator quipped.

It was McCain’s first time on the show and followed Palin’s guest role last month. The seasoned senator looked far more comfortable, said a lot more and his self-deprecating commentary was more pointed.

The pretend Palin also pulled out T-shirts saying “Palin 2012” and said she wouldn’t be returning to Alaska after the election.

“I’m either running in four years or I’m going to be a white Oprah,” she said.