Soccer: Robbie keen to upset home crowd

Robbie Keane is ready to clinch the Republic of Ireland’s World Cup dream with a single strike that is likely to send the Islamic nation of Iran into deep mourning and probably provoke a riot of frustrated fervour tomorrow afternoon.

In the teeming city of Tehran, football is almost regarded with the same passion as their religion which decries any form of alleged Western decadence, including a total ban on alcohol and a Muslim order that women, even visitors from abroad, must be dressed top to toe to prevent giving offence to Allah.