Terrace Talk - Liverpool: And on to Kiev we go, one big happy family

“Let’s give Madrid something to think about”. Yes, let’s. Who the hell are Brighton, for starters.

Terrace Talk - Liverpool: And on to Kiev we go, one big happy family

We’ve spent weeks turning the final day into a cliff-hanger, then pffft. Oh well, I’m sure the telly bods were happy enough.

Once Lovren got the second, minds turned elsewhere with a nostalgic hurrah to Rafa for putting his worshippers at Chelsea out of their misery.

This was a clinical performance overall, with a nice goal for Solanke who’s rarely looked the part. Maybe he just needed that opener to start things rolling — like Ian Rush… No injuries either. Klopp couldn’t have planned it better. Now for serous business.

There are plenty who sneer at fourth as an achievement but it steered us towards Kiev after all and that shouldn’t be sneezed at.

Except the whole idea behind your club ‘achieving’ anything is that you the supporter might get to share in it by, ooh I don’t know, being there?

That’s where it falls apart. The hard-luck stories are already heartbreaking, the exploitation of those who’ll actually make it to Ukraine scandalous. It’s always been this way, though.

Try toughening up and say you can do just fine without such frippery. You’re fooling nobody.

The numbers game involving those who want to go, who deserve to go and who will eventually go concludes with a percentage so small it won’t even beep on Uefa’s radar. Doesn’t make it right obviously – and our club shouldn’t be virtually colluding.

Europe was never my obsession thankfully, though I’m glad I went to Istanbul. Tens of thousands also got there, largely because nobody else (certainly not Milan) gave a damn. Twenty years’ absence will ensure deprived souls put up with almost anything.

There’ll be plenty of Reds who get out there, enraging all school-prefect-till-60 types who believe their own team’s fans would never go without a ticket or the relevant ID.

The gap between club and supporters seems unbridgeable. Handwringing and shrugged shoulders just don’t cut it; they’re almost as complicit in this mess as Uefa.

To the disenfranchised, Klopp is a handy cheerleader convincing the gullible that we matter and are in fact a family. Manson, Addams; do your own punchline.

It tainted the Brighton game, the points only ensuring everyone gets to play their self-deluding roles next season too. Compelling stuff.

Maybe it’s the fact Liverpool did their best to self-destruct in recent weeks. There’s only so much worry you can take before initiating deflective action. You shield yourself, ending up dead inside.

That’s kinda how I felt and I didn’t even set my heart on going to the final. It’s outrage by proxy, I suppose.

It’s been a really entertaining season for the most part. We score plenty, are sublime going forward, but defence is almost an afterthought. Can anyone deny there’s a soft centre when we’re pressurised?

They threw millions at Southampton (again) hoping van Dijk would somehow fix the whole shebang, and he has made it a bit better.

Klopp will stick with Karius, the illusion of having solved the goalkeeper conundrum played out by those who genuinely believe it or those who can’t be bothered arguing with the Mesmerised anymore.

Klopp got Liverpool to Kiev on a relative shoestring and the Yanks’ll love that. They’ll get seats of course, best in the house. Now they don’t even have to go to Anfield for their one game a year and can skip their inoculations as a bonus.

The lifeblood of the club is television and the Champions League now. Fans get bread and butter for a price (tasty as it’s been), but the caviar’s for ‘them’.

I’d say it was only Liverpool who turn achievement into debacle so swiftly but all the other pigs bury their snouts in the trough.

Watch some pretty decent football whenever you can, pick and choose, but don’t expect preferential treatment for ultra-loyalty. They’ll laugh in your face.

They always have.

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