Hyping transfer window pain

THE earnest young reporter who screamed “Everton fans, this is what you’ve been waiting for” as an unheard-of player from an unpronounceable club was linked with a loan move to Goodison will tell you otherwise; but transfer deadline day has rapidly become just another agonising parade of meaningless hype.

It’s 24 hours of artificial tension and enforced hyperbole punctuated by high-octane but low-interest newsflashes from empty training grounds whipped supporters into a frenzy on Sky Sports ahead of the big 11pm deadline last night.

Online, fans texted mysterious sightings of players and their agents as if they were UFOs — which they might well have been.