The dark heart of Europe

WE begin today with a special message for all those airline pilots who, research tells us, are avid readers of these pages.

“Good morning, this is your columnist speaking. Zxdivkeolufal dnei major scandal elddlejdldfieh ximkl football superstars aidkelnkdjxlxs gfhsio naked ladies xid dkdkj sisffuf, not to mention quantities of shaving foam and fgormcvjs xi fxchdo bkbscjdq. Now please sit back and enjoy the rest of the column.”

What is it with pilots and their in-flight announcements? There you are looking out the window at 35,000 feet and idly wondering is that place down there Kinnegad or possibly Moscow when the main man comes over the PA to update you on the progress of the flight.