Rugby referee Joy Neville features in moving documentary about Ireland's forgotten families
Co-founder and Voluntary CEO of Cliona’s Foundation Brendan Ring, pictured with documentary participant David Crowe and Ambassador Joy Neville at the launch of "Ireland's Forgotten Families" People’s Park, Limerick. Picture: Keith Wiseman
Leading rugby referee Joy Neville admits she is something of poacher turned gamekeeper when it comes to officiating the world's top players.
A Grand Slam winner with Ireland in 2013, Neville has since gone on to shatter every glass ceiling she has encountered on route to become a leading official in the men's game.
And she says that experience of occasionally crossing the line on international duty has informed how she deals with today's players.
"We had an analyst with Ireland back in the day — a big reason why we won the Grand Slam as far as I was concerned.
"He would come in and tell us, 'you got away with these penalties'. Joy, you could have been penalised here, you could have been penalised there. You were offside there. In every section, it was Joy.
"All the girls used to slag me that I went onto referee, that this is ridiculous. But I suppose I knew the game well and I knew how to manipulate the referee to some degree.
"But 100%, now I would have been able to spot (my transgressions) back in the day.
"Having that experience at that level, it's definitely aided my refereeing, knowing what the players want to achieve.
"The hardest part of refereeing is man-management. It's not one approach. It's being able to understand the best approach with people to get the best outcome. That comes with time and making mistakes and experience."
Neville admits she only decided to become a referee when a close friend she trusted told her a woman would never ref at the top level of the men's game in his lifetime.
"I finished our conversation, picked up the phone and said 'I am in'."
Neville was speaking on Virgin Media's Six O'Clock Show to promote a documentary being screened tonight on the station called 'Ireland’s Forgotten Families'.
And if giving away a few penalties has informed her refereeing, becoming a parent has given her fresh empathy for the families featured.
The two-part programme focuses on the stories of four Irish families who have cared for a child with a life-limiting illness. And on the work of the Cliona Foundation to support these families and many others like them.
For eight years Neville has been a supporter of Cliona, a charity co-founded by Limerick man Brendan Ring, who together with his wife Terry, have worked tirelessly to support families in dire financial straits due to time taken off work and the cost of caring for sick children. The Rings lost their own daughter, Cliona, to a brain tumour.
Brendan said: "So many of us are parents, we have all had to take care of a sick child at some stage in our lives. For the majority of us, our precious child bounces back and all is well again, but for approximately 4,000 families in Ireland this is not the case, they face an arduous, daily struggle with long term, life-limiting illness."
One of the featured families in the documentary is the Crowes, whose daughter Sarah sadly passed away after a brave battle with Alpers (Mitochondrial disease) in 2016. Sarah was just 12 years old.
"However difficult the illness was for Sarah and those who loved her, her family are keen for people to know that she lived a life filled with love and laughter. This message is a recurring theme throughout all four stories. The great love, devotion, and dedication these families have for their child and each other is truly something to behold. Cliona’s Foundation believe that these families deserve all the support and kindness that we, as a society, can offer to them."
Giving birth to her first child, Alfie, last year, gave Neville a deeper understanding of what families with sick children are going through.
"Since having Alfie, it's brought a whole new element, a new layer of understanding to what Cliona are trying to achieve.
One story that will be shared tomorrow night @9pm on @VirginMedia_TV “Ireland’s Forgotten Families” 🙏 A true insight into the unbelievable work that @ClionasFDN provide to families with a child or children with life limiting illnesses ❤️ #AMustWatch pic.twitter.com/PD5GmPPAYX
— Joy Neville (@JoyNevilleRef) April 20, 2022
"It is a very difficult documentary to watch. It's insightful, it's raw, how beneficial Cliona has been to these families. To put petrol in the car, to not worry bout losing the roof over their heads. To make sure the siblings have as normal a life as possible. I hear stories of parents who have slept in their cars. I'd love for people to just watch it and do what they can. Cliona told me they have 45 applications from families in the last few months alone and they don't know if they can help."
Brendan Ring added: “It has never been more important to raise awareness for the forgotten families Cliona’s work with. The cost of living is rising daily. As a result, more families with seriously sick children or children with a life-limiting illness, who would likely not have needed our financial support before, are now coming to us for help. It is time to tell their stories so please, tune in to watch what we know will be one of the most inspiring programmes you will see in 2022”.
CONNECT WITH US TODAY
Be the first to know the latest news and updates
