Does anyone know where Shevchenko is?

I HOPE no one minds but I thought I could use this week’s column to try and find out where the hell Shevchenko is.
Does anyone know where Shevchenko is?

Just before the season started we were told that he had a “slight back strain” and we haven’t seen hide nor hair of him since. Despite not being fit to play for Chelsea, be on the bench or even train with the team, he managed to play 50 minutes for the Ukraine last week. He apparently is also down to play in some charity game later this month.

Chelsea themselves have remained very tight-lipped on the whole affair. I scoured the match-day programme and there was not one mention of him; Chelsea TV have not even uttered his name since pre-season. Something fishy is going on here. This could be a valuable lesson learnt, albeit a very expensive one, to our owner — do not interfere in the team. I swear that if I see another one of our multi-million pound players bugger off to another club, while we still pick up a good proportion of his wages, I will not be responsible for my actions!

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