FC Porto teach Bayern Munich the meaning of hubris

Hubris. Now there’s a word I really like, with its hint of a serpent’s hiss at the end offset by the near certainty that the slithery one is in for a nasty surprise.

Hence, its close connection to another fine word, schadenfreude, that incomparable feeling of universal glee when the mighty are made to look upon their works and despair.

There was plenty of hubris on display in Porto on Wednesday night as Bayern Munich slumped to an astonishing 3-1 defeat in the first leg of their Champions League quarter-final.

But, unless you were a deliriously happy local, I would propose that there was less schadenfreude than might have been expected at the felling of the German giants, mainly because it’s never pleasing to see a great football man like Pep Guardiola left shell-shocked and impotent on the sidelines.

However, in what might be a football first, the heaviest price for the shock defeat has actually been paid by Bayern’s medical staff, with club doctor Hans-Wilhelm Muller-Wohlfahrt and three of his assistants resigning in the aftermath.

The 72-year-old Muller-Wohlfahrt, a fixture at the club for almost 40 years, charged that “a relationship of trust” had been broken, with his medical team, he felt, being “made responsible for the defeat for inexplicable reasons”.

From a distance, he certainly seems to have a point. Bayern were without Arjen Robben, Franck Ribery, Bastian Schweinsteiger and David Alaba for the game against Porto, with reports later suggesting that Guardiola wanted answers, in particular, about Ribery’s puzzling ankle problem, which has now seen the Frenchman sidelined for over a month, despite the initial prognosis indicating that he would be out for only a matter of days.

And, just over a week ago, the manager had hardly endeared himself to his medics when he appeared to sarcastically applaud the home dugout as yet another Bayern player, Mehdi Benatia, joined the mounting sick list after incurring an injury against Bayer Leverkusen.

But the good doctor has some serious support for his claim that responsibility for the defeat at the Estadio do Drago lies elsewhere: step forward, Franz Beckenbauer, a man who knows a bit about when to play, and when not to play, out from the back. And, when not to fall asleep on on the job.

On Wednesday, Brazilian defender Dante was caught napping by Quaresma who ran on to put the home side two-up, this after Porto had already taken the lead through a first-minute penalty which had followed a similar act of self-destruction by Xabi Alonso. And the defending for the third was pretty shabby too. “Well, Dante,” sighed ‘Der Kaiser’. “Were he from Iceland, or from the North Pole, then I would say he had his ski boots on.”

Certainly, one mistake can be put down to individual error, but two more and a final scoreline of 3-1? Well, with all due respect to Porto’s fine performance on the night, this medical professional has no hesitation in diagnosing Bayern’s problem as a classic case of galloping hubris.

We’ve seen it before, of course, and at an even higher level. By common consent, the greatest team never to win the World Cup was the stellar Brazilian side of Zico, Socrates, Falcao, Eder et al who, as a result of some calamitous defensive lapses, were serially punished by the opportunistic Paolo Rossi as eventual winners Italy eliminated them from the 1982 tournament.

Indeed, even when one thinks about the greatest team ever to win the World Cup, there was still, in that final of 1970, an almost textbook example of what Jack Charlton used to call “fannyin’ aboot” at the back, as Brazil gifted a sloppy equaliser to Italy’s Roberto Boninsegna before, thankfully, normal service was resumed with their glorious 4-1 triumph.

Which brings us, nicely, to Barcelona. If Brazil in Mexico all of 45 years ago were the best I’ve ever seen from a distance, Barcelona in the Champions League final at Wembley in 2011 were the best I’ve been privileged to see in the flesh.

This was the night when Messi, Iniesta and Xavi made Manchester United look like a pub team, as they swaggered to a 3-1 win which should have been more. Watching the new Barca sweep aside PSG the other night, it was hard to not to conclude they are back to something close to their 2012 pomp, with that irresistible attacking trident of Messi, Suarez and Neymar coming on like the football version of a supergroup.

If Barca are to go on and reclaim the Champions League, they too will have to be on guard against hubris, and not least because, in common with so many of the great attacking teams in football history – in their specific case, in the absence of a real leader at the back, like Carlos Puyol - they have a tendency to throw opponents a lifeline.

Well, at least Bayern won’t be falling foul of hubris when Porto fetch up at the Allianz Arena. Unless, of course, they think that the 2-0 win which would still be enough to put them through to the semi-finals is perfectly within their compass.

It probably is but, given that, in having to chase the game from the off, they could easily concede an away goal, then Pep Guardiola would be advised to park his health concerns in favour of safety ones on the night.

Because, even with a bit of a mountain to climb, there can be no excuse for the ski boots next time around.