Football tennis hopefuls prove it never hurts to ask
The Leeds legend — whose excellent autobiography is out at the moment, by the way — had played in midfield in a defeat to Trinidad and Tobago. The FAI issued two caps.
Representing your country is never cheap, but not since Dana was elected to Brussels will Europe have welcomed Irish representatives as unlikely as the crowd we’re sending out next week.
Meet Steven Conway and Ireland’s first Football Tennis team.
As in an Aaron Sorkin screenplay like The Social Network, let’s wind back a little. A few weeks ago Conway and a few college friends were knocking a football around a green area in the university town of Maynooth.
They eventually fell into a game of tennis, essentially, with the football, lobbing it back and forth over an imagined net.
Later — and after a few drinks admittedly — as the sun ducked behind the old grey-bricked buildings, and the lads headed back to their digs.
They cracked open a laptop, and instead of inventing Facebook they tapped ‘football tennis’ into the Google search box.
“Basically Jamie — our team captain — sent an email to the organisers, FIFTA. We saw there was this tournament coming up with free accommodation, free meals and stuff in Turkey,” says Conway, who plays for Sligo club Kilglass/Enniscrone.
And after settling in for the night with a few cans, they were surprised a few days later when a terse reply dropped into Jamie’s inbox: “Yes we would love for Ireland to be represented at our world championships”. Wow.
“We couldn’t believe when we got an invitation back — we still can’t believe it!” says Conway, when I rang him this week after they’d finished their midday training session in the midlands college town.
“I had to tell my local soccer club that I would be unavailable for selection next week as I would be away on international duty. Who doesn’t want to do that…”
The club vs country debate rages on as the Collingwood Cup tips into view.
Now, to paraphrase Corinthians, it’s time to fold away childish things. The students, I’m guessing, tucked away the borrowed traffic cones from the sitting room, swore off bargain-store own-brand beer Galahad and got organised for this world title bid.
They first registered their new “organisation” as part of the Football Tennis federation so they could compete, paying €60 each.
They are now the governing body of the sport in Ireland. Next stop the world championships in Turkey. What a country, ladies and gentlemen.
There they expect to face teams from Moldova, North Cyprus, Romania, Slovakia, Turkey and India over three days from December 9.
But they’re unsure of how many games they’ll get exactly: “We think when we get out there there’ll be a group stage first, but we don’t really know. It’s hard to get details out of the organiser because the promoter is so busy — and his English is so bad.”
Like the Caribbean produces a statistically improbable number of sprinters — does Budapest produce pros in football tennis?
“Pros? Well I don’t know if those countries have too many pros, do they? But looking at the clips on YouTube, they’re pretty serious about the whole thing. We’re practicing four and five times a week and we’re just trying to get a handle on the laws.
“We had the rule book emailed to us from the president and it must have been the first time they were translated into English because the wording was hilarious. A lack of good quality videos on YouTube and the fact there are videos with the old rules up made it confusing there for a good while,” Conway — an Arts graduate — adds.
“We’ve got our jerseys made by O’Neill’s, the flights are booked, accommodation and food sorted. We badly need some sponsorship to cover the costs but it’s not an ideal time with Christmas coming up and that budget on the horizon really.”
As well as campaigning on the website Boob.ie, they’ve set up a Facebook page that potential sponsors can find by search Football Tennis Ireland.
Of the eight heading out, only six will pull on the new jerseys they had commissioned. Two — chief delegate and manager — will wear suits on the sideline. Their other duties are as yet unclear.
It is unclear if the non-playing members will receive caps. Or medals, if the Maynooth students take the world title.
- Contact: adrianjrussell@gmail.com. Twitter: @adrianrussell
