Tearing up the newspaper in rage? A dying fit of pique

GO TO your local bookstore. Beat the familiar path past the graphic novels, travel guides and cooking manuals to the sports section. Trace your finger along the shelf’s edge until you alight at the Js. There, with a bit of luck, you’ll find BS Johnson’s The Unfortunates.

His by-line is unfamiliar now, but Johnson was once a football reporter with the Observer newspaper in England in the 1960s.

But not really.