Equal rights march to Dáil after Benjy spared

There is an extremely high degree of discontent among the heterosexual bovine population, in particular among those about to be slaughtered.

And plans are ahoof for a stampede on Dáil Éireann in a frustrated attempt to gain equality with Benjy, who avoided the slaughterhouse simply because of his homosexuality. His owner said Benjy displayed sexual urges towards male cattle and failed to inseminate any of the cows he was mixing with. The gay bull was being fattened after a vet declared his sexual orientation the reason he would not breed. Now his life has been spared because of his homosexuality. This stampede is about equal rights for all the herd.

Patrick Murray