Going by the book can result in a nasty rash of paper cuts

SHE may not be the financial controller from hell, but she’s up there in contention for the title.

If you buy a pen, you have to prove you’re going to use it all the time for work purposes and not be writing love letters on the sly with it. If you lose the receipt for the pen, tough luck, you’re goosed. If you send something by taxi, she wants to know why you didn’t use a courier.

If you use a courier, she asks why you didn’t drop the message off on your way home, seeing as how you pass the recipient’s address. She guards our company solvency like a Rottweiler. Without her, the nick we are in would not be good.