My goal was to find the T-shirt whose slogan was so funny... that women would want to be with me, men would want to be me

A significant capital investment is required. I cannot ignore the crumbling — and indeed bobbling — infrastructure for much longer. I’m going to have to buy some clothes.

It’s been a while. The last major purchase was bought under the previous development plan Horizon 2015 Get Rid of Them Rags so I must once again go out into the marketplace. How will I keep up with the fashion trends that have changed since? Quite easily in fact. I have had my fashion moments in my teens; never, of course, backed up by real money. Just wardrobes abandoned by nest-flown older brothers. There were long coats for a while, then padded checked jackets with baggy jeans trying to emulate Ice Cube if Ice Cube could only shop in Guineys.

Then came the combat years. Remember when every young male and some females — especially in the countryside — seemed to be in uniform? It made Dripsey look like it was being held by guerrillas who were awaiting the outcome of peace negotiations. Albeit guerrillas who spent a lot of time smoking and leaning against things. War is hell, people.