That’s why people go on cruises, you know. They eat all day and all night

Monday morning and I’m at home, returning a Whatsapp call from my mother that kept dropping earlier this morning.

“Oh,” my mother says, “I’m glad you called back.” She says she’s sitting in a cafe with her old friend, Sheila. “So you’ll have to speak up,” she says, “there’s a lot of background noise.”

“I’ll call you when you get home,” I say.