‘No good reason for a bad hangover’

As the ball bounced cruelly off Shay Given’s head and in for Croatia’s third goal, one kindly young female fan groaned and exclaimed “Ah, the poor fella!”

Her partner beside her in the pub quickly turned to her, “Sure Jesus, the way we’re playin’, it’s feckin’ typical!”

The pint punditry had well and truly kicked in by that stage as even the more well-oiled were realising Ireland’s chances of getting back in contention were fading fast.