Enda stamps on Grinch Gilmore’s presents

JOE “No-Ho-Ho” Higgins did his best to ruin Labour’s Christmas as only a true atheist can — but it was Enda Kenny who smashed down his Coalition partner’s tree and stamped on Eamon’s Gilmore’s presents.

Labour TDs looked on with a mixture of confusion, bewilderment and anger playing across their silent little faces — like children being told Santa Claus does not exist — as the Taoiseach promised: “I will make an honest leader of the Tánaiste, Deputy Gilmore.”

The Tánaiste was not in the chamber to hear the extraordinary put down, but he was soon getting it from all sides as some of his TDs left him in no doubt they thought he was a bit of a wimp in the prickly parliamentary meeting that followed.