Fancy that — Wallace adds colour to dull day

OH, thank God for the Indy TDs, not only were they the loudest opposition voice yesterday — but they’re just so damn handy for fashion tips.

Dáil dress sense was a no-no subject in the last Oireachtas when the merest mention of a Beverly Flynn or Mary Coughlan outfit raising eyebrows would ensure cries of sexism.

But now Mick Wallace has made meterosexuals of us all as the fashion Fancy Dan of the 31st Dáil breaks the taboo on talk-of-the-town tailoring.

Always ahead of the pack, Mick was sporting pink last week, but, darling, that was sooo last week, and yesterday he settled on a striking green khaki ensemble for the opening show of this seasons Leaders Questions — his daringly exposed elbows, polo shirt and hiking boots meaning he was bang on trend for both national parliament and building site.

Indeed, one Leinster House wag observed: “It looks like he doesn’t just have a horse outside, but a hod-carrier to go with it.”

But at least Mick brought a splash of life to an otherwise colourless first full day of the new Dáil.

Though even Enda Kenny still seemed a tad surprised that he was really, finally, Taoiseach, accidentally referring to Micheál Martin as “minister” at one point.

The FF chief was delighted by Mr Kenny’s as Gaeilge slip of the tongue, no doubt aware that it will be many years — if ever — before he can hope to boast a Cabinet title again.

There he was with his bedraggled band of not so merry men, squashed in between the Shinners and the Indies on the scrap of Dáil benches left unoccupied by the Fine Gael/Labour hordes who now dominate all before them.

Enda enjoyed an easy first outing as head of Government as he effortlessly bated away softly-softly opposition questions from FF and SF alike, while the blissful hue of political honeymoon continue to hang over him.

Only socialist veteran Joe Higgins started as he means to go on — accusing Mr Kenny of a “monumental betrayal” of the country within five seconds of rising to his feet.

As one of three rotating speakers for the mish-mash technical group of Leftists, Rightists and What-am-I-doing-here-at-all-ist Independents, Mr Higgins knew he needed to get as much oomph into his questions as possible and threw everything at Mr Kenny from imagery of a bankers orgy of greed and tanks rolling over the poor, to a new financial famine blighting Ireland.

“I’m not sure what sort of orgies you’re talking about,” Enda dead-paned after rather cruelly reminding Mr Higgins that he had been turfed-out of the Dáil by voters four years ago and might not be fully up to speed on what had transpired since then.

Across the chamber Joan Burton looked a lot perkier than when she found out she’d been shafted and given the social protection role last Wednesday, but despite the smiles there was no disguising the chill-zone body language on display when the sudden exit of Richard Bruton from the front bench meant she had no choice but to shift up the row and sit next to Brendan Howlin, the very man handed the public expenditure portfolio almost everyone expected to be hers for the taking.

And for all his talk of a new era of open, responsive government, Enda showed he had already mastered the age-old Leaders’ Questions trick of the leader not actually answering the question.

But he did repossess Bertie’s state car, so that should keep the honeymoon with voters alive — for a few more days at any rate.