Believe every new story yesterday? Bigger fool you

BEWARE the Ides of March may be notorious advice, but “be careful of April 1 news stories” should give rise to a similarly wary nature.

Yesterday, Ireland awoke to claims that Garda motor fines are to be sponsored by Specsavers, Thierry Henry will open the FAI’s new Aviva Stadium and that Taoiseach Brian Cowen is set to buy every citizen a pint to apologise for the financial crisis.

The April Fool’s motif was repeated in Britain, where soon-to-be general election voters were subjected to an advertisement “celebrating 13 years of effective waste maximisation” by government and claims of the “world’s first flavoured page”.