Time to have a ball without the Rebel yell

A CHAMPIONSHIP without Cork is like a wedding without a bride — impossible to celebrate.

But before Rebels fans trade hat, scarves and headbands for Bananarama big hair bows, humming along to the chorus of Cruel Summer and not Amhrán na bhFiann, maybe they should look beyond the Atlantic Pond for summertime entertainment.

The first potential vacuum for Cork’s football supporters is June 8, when Cork take on the winners of Limerick/Tipperary in the Munster Senior Football Championship (SFC) semi-final. The second is June 15, when the Rebels take on Tipperary in the Munster Senior Hurling Championship (SHC) semi-final at Páirc Uí Chaoimh.

The third is June 29, the date of the Munster SFC final, which most cocky Cork supporters will have pencilled in as a date with destiny.

While June 8 offers little alternative other than the Canadian F1 Grand Prix in Montreal — a trip beyond the limits of a Thermos flask — things are looking up by June 15. This is when the Cork Midsummer Festival kicks off, with its multiple venues, theatrics, musical variety and entrance fees no dearer in many cases than a ticket to the Munster final.

June 29 is Irish Derby day at the Curragh, full of glamorous women tottering about in the type of heels unlikely to clip the steps of the Cusack Stand. For the less excitable, the Handball One Wall Nationals get under way in Sligo. For the soccer-mad, Euro 2008, winds down on June 29.

Come July, it’s Munster SHC final time, but Rebels at a loose end on July 13 can unwind at Oxegen, where the Kings of Leon are already signed up to perform. Returning to Punchestown Racecourse, Naas, Co Kildare, from July 11-13 (subject to licence), the lineup for Oxegen 2008 will be announced this month and promoters are promising an amazing mix of talent from global superstars to Ireland’s very best. If music is not your bag, sport aficionados can take in the Cork City Sports on July 12, head to Killarney for the racing festival or don the Helly Hanson sailing gear and head to the Royal Cork Yacht Club in Crosshaven, Co Cork, for the hobbing and nobbing of Cork Week.

August, quarter-final and semi-final time, offers plenty alternatives, starting with the Beijing Olympics on August 8 right through to August 24. Those normally enthralled by the SFC semi-final can instead spend the day enjoying the spectacular closing ceremonies guaranteed by the Chinese Olympic hosts.

Puck Fair coincides with the SFC quarter-finals, so instead of watching a routing by Kerry, Rebels can travel west in memory of Cromwell’s Roundheads who pillaged the countryside at the foot of the McGillycuddy Reeks. At the end of the month it’s time for the Electric Picnic and a touch of class at Ireland’s “boutique” music festival where adults can enjoy a roll, without the muck.

September brings the All-Ireland finals, the Galway Racing Festival and the Ryder Cup — or for those with a different type of sport in mind — the Munich Oktoberfest where dancing in dirndls is as entertaining as anything on a pitch.