We kid you not, it’s the Late Late Toy Show

AS SURE as the absence of snow on Christmas Day, the Late Late Toy Show is an annual constant on the Irish seasonal calendar.

The nation will hold its breath tonight to see which stylish threads Pat Kenny has chosen for his annual sleigh trip to boredom. Or maybe that’s just the view of those of us not enraptured by kiddies’ toys.

To be fair, for most parents with children counting down the days to Santa’s arrival, the show gives them some idea of what the tweenies next door will be getting. But many have already cashed in the piggy banks to avail of the early “bargains” before the toy shops get too busy.

When Gay Byrne was in charge, there was a sense of excitement among young children up and down the country that they could stay up after the late news to see what wonders might await them on Christmas morning.

I’m sure it’s probably the same now for pre-teens who never heard of The Late Late Show and who think this Pat fella is the bee’s knees.

We adults, however, won’t exactly be shaking at the knees as we’re given “previews” of the season’s most popular and zany presents for younger people.

According to researcher Helen Kelleher, who has been visiting toy fairs since the end of the last festive season, a huge range of favourites will be on show with help from dozens of youngsters from around the country.

But while everything is sure to be as well organised as ever, producers will not be following the recent advice from the Equality Authority to avoid gender stereotyping of certain toys. So don’t expect too many young boys demonstrating the merits of the latest Bratz dolls or pigtailed girls trying out the latest gadgets and gizmos.

“We’ll aim to showcase the best of everything tomorrow night, from remote-control to cuddly toys,” said Ms Kelleher during yesterday’s sneak preview of the set.

Fresh from his visit to Santa Claus in Lapland, Pat wasn’t giving too much away about the bearded one’s preparations but he did admit: “Santa had a cold and was sniffing away. Fingers crossed that the big man is feeling better for the big night.”

By which we presume the RTÉ presenter means Christmas night and not the Late Late Toy Show.

Elves and pixies are promised for those tuning in tonight, and when news coverage from Dáil Éireann concludes, Pat will invite us to his studio with enchanted forests and a real taste of Lapland.

The entertainment slots are being filled by singers James Blunt and the Sugababes, while US comedian Jerry Seinfeld will help add to the festive cheer. Let’s hope his appearance does not need clearance from the RTÉ authorities, in case he says anything that might upset the balance of the debate on the best Christmas toys.

* The Late Late Toy Show, RTÉ One tonight at 9.30pm.