Back-to-school an annual nightmare for parents

PREPARING children to go back to school causes as much stress to parents as moving house, starting a job or getting married.

As thousands of secondary and primary school children trudge back to classrooms around the country over the next couple of days, their parents are reaching new heights of anxiety and stress, according to a new study.

The survey of more than 1,000 parents found that the annual ritual of packing the children off to school sent them into a tailspin of stress and expense and unlike marriage or moving home, parents must endure the torture annually for at least 12 years.

One of the most stressful parts of starting the new term is the perennial tug-of-war between parents and children about what is necessary and what is fashionable.

A quarter of parents refuse to allow children to make their own choices, with fathers worse than mothers, the British survey said.

Seven in 10 parents said girls, rather than boys, were responsible for the most arguments during back-to-school preparations.

Overall, parents said the end of the summer holidays was more fraught than family holidays, visiting relatives, parents' evenings and school reports.

President of the National Parents Council of Ireland (Post-Primary), Micheal O'Regan, said the start of the school year was an extremely expensive and worrying time for parents.

"It is a very expensive time for parents and some students want the best of everything, even if the money is not there," Mr O'Regan said.

"It can put a huge financial strain on parents, particularly if they leave it to the last minute to get things," he said.

Mr O'Regan estimated that the cost of sending three or four children back to school could be as much 1,500.

"It can cost between 400 and 500 to send a child to school between buying books, uniforms, gym gear, runners, shoes and equipment."

Sidney Crown, a consultant psychologist in Britain, said children felt pressure to keep up with their peers, while parents were more concerned with practicality and value for money.

"These basic tensions are then further exacerbated by the fact that parents are out of touch with what their kids consider important," Dr Crown said.

"Unless both sides can be accommodating, it's a sure-fire recipe for conflict," he said.