Divorce children ‘do worse at school’

CHILDREN of divorced parents do worse at school, have less social skills and are at greater risk of depression, according to one of the country’s leading psychiatrists.

They also cope better with the loss of a parent due to death rather than through separation or divorce, said Patricia Casey, Professor of Psychiatry at the Mater Hospital and UCD.

"Children are damaged by separation and divorce. During the divorce referendum there was misinformation that in any bad marriage it was better to separate. The research shows that is not the case.

"It is better for children for the marriage to break up if there is violence or abuse. But where the relationship is not what it was, if there are arguments or where it has gone stale, the research shows that it isn't," she said.

Prof Casey said that not every child of divorced parents would be damaged as the research looked at large groups of people over a long period of time rather than individuals.

She said the sense of loss children feel when parents separate is greater than when a parent dies. "There is loss and pain when a parent dies, but at least there is closure. With a divorce or a separation the child still longs for the way things were, and they have to deal with access issues and living arrangements. These issues make it more difficult for children to cope with divorce than with bereavement."

Training and development manager for the Marriage and Relationship Counselling Service Lisa O'Hara agrees. Bereavement means the parent is gone, but with divorce the parents are still around and often in conflict sometimes using the children as bargaining tools with devastating consequences. Ms O'Hara felt that children could be helped through their parents' divorce if adults and children had access to courses and support groups.

However, lecturer in the department of psychology at Trinity College Dublin, Dr Diane Hogan, said she was unaware of any research that showed the effects of a divorce are worse than a bereavement.

A report on 'Children's Experiences of Parental Separation' by Dr Hogan, Ann Marie Halpenny and Prof Sheila Greene, of the Children's Research Centre at Trinity in 2002, found that children could come through a separation without suffering significant difficulties.

"It depends on the individual child, their family and how the parents manage the separation. What is clear is that children do better if there is ongoing, meaningful contact with the non-resident parent," Dr Hogan said.