Bertie’s cracking grasp of language

THE list of languages translated in the Justus Lipsius Building in Brussels, where the EU Summit is taking place, has one vacancy at the bottom.

Deutsch, English, Francais, Italian, Nederlands, Dansk, ENNHNIKA, Espanol, Portugues, Suomi and Svenska occupy the first 11 slots, representing the working languages of the pre-enlargement European Union.

Yesterday evening it was suggested that the last space was reserved for ‘Bertiespeak’, to explain the Taoiseach’s oft lamented unique form of dialect to the assembled international media.

On the brink of his finest hour of negotiating skills though, Bertie Ahern was in no mood for rambling and stuck to his finely honed tight script.

Putting in a commanding and shrewd performance as he hosted a press conference to give an update of the status of the negotiations on the contentious Constitution for Europe and the delicate selection of a new European Commission President, Mr Ahern gave little away and was an uncharacteristic waffle-free zone.

Significantly, as he was repeatedly asked about the Presidential appointment, and his own name remaining in the frame, Mr Ahern kept his cards close to his chest as he delivered short, sharp answers, indicating he had a carefully calculated plan, but wasn’t going to let it be known just yet.

“The rule is Qualified Majority Voting and if you know something I don’t know you should inform me,” he replied to a query about the prospect of his name going forward as other candidates might be blocked.

“What we have been discussing today is the IGC. Tonight we will be discussing the appointment,” Mr Ahern answered to another question.

“If I had just one candidate at the dinner, it would be easier still,” he said with a grin as he was pursued again.

The Taoiseach, along with his colleagues the Minister for Foreign Affairs, Brian Cowen, and the Minister for European Affairs, Dick Roche, have done their talking quietly over the past six months.

Deftly consulting on an ongoing basis with the leaders of the 24 other countries making up the newly enlarged EU, Mr Ahern has whittled that list of moot points down to a position where a deal can be done with all sides set to leave the table satisfied.

The EU Constitution jigsaw was left in bits when Mr Ahern took control six months ago, with around 80 pieces left out of place by Italian Prime Minister Silvio Berlusconi.

Now there are only five awkward, yet key, fragments left to manoeuvre into position and the Taoiseach appears relatively confident it can be done.

“I am not over-optimistic. There are still very difficult issues we have to deal with. Now we have to work on what was started. Certainly the whole atmosphere was positive,” Mr Ahern said as he summarised the chances of finishing the job he wasn’t even expected to start.

Ironically, after overcoming all those hurdles, the selection of a new EU chief became more difficult than the Constitution itself.

The EU leaders mused over a prospective EU President over Wild Irish smoked salmon with crème fraiche, Wicklow lamb with asparagus, Irish farmhouse cheeses, Meringue with Summer fruits, washed down by Condrieu 2002 white wine and Chateau MacCarthy, Saint-Estephe, 2000 white wine.

The Belgian public was engrossed in the outcome of their country’s most infamous affair yesterday as the paedophile Marc Dutroux was found guilty of abduction, rape and murder after a three-month trial.

Right on their doorstep, though, a little bit of history was about to be made.

The pivotal figure involved was an Irishman who doesn’t speak French or German, and often has difficulty with English, yet managed to speak the language of 24 European leaders and have them all communicating perfectly.

The lad from Drumcondra is the hero of the hour and the toast of Europe.