Sundance Walsh star in Showground at the 15m Ranch

IT’S a shame that Charlie McCreevy is shooting down the Irish film industry, because Once Upon a Time In Punchestown would be a real box office blockbuster.

Setting the scene yesterday, the deputies in the Leinster House sheriff's department were honing in on a mysterious incident where 15m was taken and invested in a ranch in the plains of Kildare.

The sub-plot appeared to involve a local bank manager, 'Butch' McCreevy, and a hombre from the south-west known as the Joe 'The Sundance Kid' Walsh.

Between them, they doubled the bounty to build an exhibition and show centre out in Punchestown by first giving the local gang 6.9m and eventually a total of 14.8m.

Obviously putting his week off to good use, Seán Ardagh donned his Sam Peckinpah hat and put together a script for the delectation of his pardners on the Public Accounts Posse, as he said it all sounded like a good cowboy story.

The Punchestown Boys rode into town saying they were going to build a corral for cattle and horses that would be good for the town.

With the help of a few John Waynes, the boys inveigled their way into an open safe in the bank and then set off. When they found it was an easy job, they came back again for a second shot at the community bank, he said.

Pegged down by continual gunfire and outnumbered, the Department of Agriculture secretary general John Malone, said it was an OK corral and that it was money well spent as it was bringing in folks from all round and even from foreign shores for shows featuring horses, livestock and farm machinery.

Big rodeos took place there, including the Pony Club Summer Camp and Santa's Kingdom, he said, prompting Pat 'Quick Draw' Rabbitte, an hombre from out the Wild West of Dublin, to suggest Santa came early in this case.

"We know who Santa is Santa is the taxpayer. We don't know yet who the cowboys are," he said.

But Michael 'High' Noonan, an experienced gun slinger from Dodge City, formerly known as Limerick, said it was time to call a spade a spade.

In all his days round these parts, The Bald Ranger said he'd never seen the likes of it before and just wondered was it that Butch McCreevy had just decided the hoedown going to happen.

In the end the PAC posse decided to mosey on out to Co Kildare to check out the prairies of Punchestown.

"Would we be supplied with horses?" asked Dan 'The Kid' Boyle, a sharpshooter who carries a biodegradable gun.

Would a receipt be supplied, might be a more appropriate question.

When it ever hits the big screen, it's hard to tell though if this epic would be a western or a fairytale or a comedy and the setting for this movie could be either LA, La-La Land or Lapland.

While Section 481 providing tax relief for film makers is being scrapped, Section 482 for buddies of Butch and Sundance is still wide open.