Rugby provides the thrills at tame conference

THE sense of confidence and roar of unity pushing the Reds on to inevitable victory was all-pervasive at the Labour conference.

But then, Munster’s triumph over the French was never really in doubt. As the delegates trickled away from the TV screens, it was a much more timid affair.

Pat Rabbitte didn’t ask us to read his lips, but did pledge no new taxes as the message was rammed home that the road to democratic socialism would be paved with well-costed pragmatism.

The sense of restraint had even infected the once-radical masses of Labour Youth. They were noticeable for their striking red T-shirts emblazoned with the slogan “boycott killer cola” in the lettering of a certain well-known soft drinks firm in protest at murders of union officials at bottling plants in Colombia.

When it was suggested that more direct action might be to picket the bar selling the hated drink, the response was: “Some of our lads are drinking pints, so a picket of the bar probably wouldn’t go down well.”

Ahhh, the heady spirit of youthful idealism triumphs again in Ireland.

But the highlight of such occasions is always the Michael McDowell-baiting, and Pat didn’t disappoint. “We’re the only state in Europe where the gardaí outside the minister’s house are there to protect the public from the minister,” he said.

With rugby drawing more interest than the workshops intended to prepare the party for Government, a telling moment occurred towards the end of the game when a streaker temporarily stopped play.

“I see a flash of pink!” shouted one delegate before the offending article was removed by the blue-adorned security guards.

Blue shirts banishing the only flash of pink at a Labour conference once more famous for the red blood spilt on the carpet in heated ideological battle than the cosy red rose logo? Maybe it’s progress, but it’s not much fun.