KATE and Gerry McCann expect the Portuguese police files on the disappearance of their daughter, Madeleine, to remain secret for another three months, the couple’s spokesman said yesterday.

It is an award they might not want to actually win – David and Victoria Beckham have been nominated for the title of Funniest Double Act in the UK.

Lad’s mag Loaded was today courting controversy by offering its readers the chance to star in a porn film as a competition prize.