Consumer Corner: How much money to put in a birthday card for a big birthday?
If money is tight, it’s important to remember that showing how much we care doesn't always have to be with how much money we spend
Parties are back with a bang in this post-covid world. There’s a bit of post-covid determination in the air where people want to celebrate more given we have missed out on a lot over the last few years.
There are a few big birthdays in our adult lives. Turning 21 is the first major one, followed by 40 and then 50, 60, 70, 80, and so on. It’s always nice to celebrate a milestone birthday and generally no matter what the party is, be it big or small, close family and friends will want to mark the occasion with a gift.
Carole Desmond recently celebrated a run of birthdays with her family and friends and said the gifts varied.
“For my really close friends and family, I gave vouchers of €100 for their big birthdays and I was also invited to a few 40th parties recently too, and put €50 in the card.”
Of course, you really can’t go wrong with money and vouchers. Carole did say when she turned 40 herself last year she was surprised by how much people gave her.
“I got presents from friends who I hadn't seen in ages. They dropped by the house with gifts ranging from expensive candles to a designer handbag. I couldn’t believe it. I guess a milestone birthday is a chance to check in with friends and family and just show you care.”
The general feedback is that €50 is plenty to put in a card if you are invited to celebrate with someone. As a token and if you want to mark the birthday then something like scratch cards are always a fun thing to pop into a card.
However, Kel Galavan, aka @mrssmartmoneyhq and author of the book said that instead of focusing on how much money to put in a card, try to think about other ways to make the birthday person feel loved.
“There's a cost of living crisis, and money has never been tighter, yet we want to be generous with those we love. Being Irish, part of our culture is to show our emotions and love through gifting and money.
“However, that is often easier said than done. Finding the balance between keeping costs in check and being generous can often be a tightrope to navigate.”
If money is tight it’s important to remember that showing how much we care doesn't always have to be with how much money we spend, said Ms Galavan.
“Instead of focusing on how much money to put in a card, try to think about other ways to make the birthday person feel loved and special. Sometimes, when many people give bigger gifts, it can make us feel like our gift isn't good enough. But remember, we are in different times and therefore different standards are needed. Gifting shouldn't be a tendering process where the heaviest envelope automatically contains the most love and affection.”
These days people generally want for very little. If you run out of perfume you might just buy it or pick up a bunch of €5 flowers in Lidl. You don’t have to wait for your birthday to be gifted flowers. That’s why thoughtful gifts are special.
Parent, Sarah Conway, said that she recently had a birthday party for her daughter and everyone put €5 in the cards, which she said was very generous — however, one child did something different...
“When my daughter opened one of the cards there was a shell necklace in there made by her friend. She had found the shell at the beach and made it into a necklace and wrote her name on it. She still has that necklace, whereas the €5s are long gone at this stage.”
Ms Galavan said that we should be proud of our gifts, whatever they are.
“Consider non-monetary gifts or experiences that are meaningful and personalised. It could be a handmade gift, a heartfelt letter, or planning a memorable day out or activity that the birthday person would enjoy.”
Another good tip on giving a great gift is pooling together. If it is a family member’s birthday for example you could pool your resources and get a joint present.
“If you're part of a group or have close friends or family members attending the birthday celebration, you can consider pooling resources together to contribute to a larger gift,” said Ms Galavan.
Also if you are spending a lot of money on someone it might be worth just asking what they would like.
“They may appreciate your honesty and understanding. My guess is that many will be relieved. So many of us are feeling the pinch, and knowing that it is ok to be honest and cut through the taboo that is money will most likely have a positive knock-on effect for everyone involved,” added Ms Galavan.
“Remember, the true spirit of gift-giving is to show your love. The thought and effort behind the gift matters most, not the amount of money spent."
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