Dear Dad: Aoibhín Garrihy, Sharon Shannon and more write letters to their fathers

Ahead of Father’s Day on June 19, four household names pay homage to the men that shaped them

Nuala O'Connor and her father Hugh O'Connor

Sat, 18 Jun, 2022 - 07:09

Ruth O'Connor

Nuala O’Connor

Dear Da, I hope that in your elsewhere there are fields to roam, another Liffey Valley in the sky, with a big oak and yew at its heart, and your beloved river running through it. I hope the riverbank is soft enough to dig up, and that the mud holds bottles, ancient coins, and clay pipes galore — your kind of treasure.

Hopefully, the angels like a good theological argument, and the harpists love to sing out ‘Amhráin’ as Gaeilge. Maybe there is even a deoirím of whiskey where you are; just a drop to warm the belly.

This is a note of gratitude, Da, for all the rambles in west Dublin and beyond; for the visits to architectural gems, intact and ruined; for the stories of your childhood, where shoes were not a given, and overcoats were blankets.

It’s a thank-you for the love of singing; for the laughter that erupted frequently; for your generosity even when times were tough. Go raibh maith agat for the love of art and the environment as important, beautiful things worth protecting.

I hope, at times, you can peek through the gauze between there and here, and see that we’re grand. Ma, too, though she has slipped further into her own elsewhere, a place where she is content, but from where she also regularly leaps with
astonishing lucidity. Ma keeps your cremation box by her and talks to you on occasion, but, no doubt, you know that already.

Da, we miss you; take care.

Grá, Nuala

Nuala O’Connor’s fifth novel, NORA: A Love Story of Nora Barnacle and James Joyce, is available in bookshops and online now. NORA is the One Dublin, One Book for 2022.

Aoibhín Garrihy

Dear Dad,

We share this special weekend. I arrived the day before Father’s Day 35 years ago, and a very special bond was formed on that sunny day in June.

When I look back on my childhood and growing up, you were everything a little girl could ask for in a Dad: Fun, kind, supportive, gentle, loving, compassionate, charitable, emotional, and hardworking.

You set the bar. You showed me all a man should be. Your ‘glass-half-full’ approach to life, your ability to see the positive in every situation, is the trait I love most about you.

It was your presence that reassured me growing up. You were always there to cheer me on from the muddy sidelines of matches or races, with straight-talking words of encouragement, as I endeavoured to do my best and make you proud.

When I think of you, I think of music and craic, your lust for life. You are a people person and those who know you, love you. Your larger-than-life humour and that roguish glint in your eye leave people feeling all the better for having met you. You’re a social butterfly.

Your words of wisdom have always guided me. Your common-sense approach to life has never led me astray. Even now, as I embark on my own parenting journey, I hope I can pass on the unwavering love you’ve shown me.

And so, Dad, as you celebrate 35 years of fatherhood (a role you’ve absolutely nailed), I want to thank you for all that you do every single day. You are one of my greatest supporters. How lucky I am to have you in my corner.

With all my love, Aoibhín x

The Aoibhín Garrihy Edit for Regatta Great Outdoors is available now in stores and online.

Ellie Kisyombe

Dear Dad/Yota,

Today, I thought so much of you with Mum. When I think of you, and am sad, I talk to you and go into the kitchen to make your favourite food — it helps to soothe my heart and brings me comfort.

Thank you for my survival skills. Thank you so much for the great wisdom that you gave me — it has helped to shape the woman I have become. You were such a lovely man — very open. There were times when I felt you were hard on me — the stupidity of youth. We always think we know everything when we are young, but you taught me manners even when I didn’t want to learn.

You taught me about the importance of forgiveness and being kind. You used to say, ‘Always remember to see something good in every person’ and ‘The little you have, remember to share it with everyone’. You taught me to love my siblings no matter what. You said we should always stick together and look after one another. I feel sorry that you missed out on my twins. They are now young adults in college and I wish you were here to see them grow.

My sister has a little girl. She’s so clever and funny and she has your features. When I see her, I hear your voice, saying: ‘I will go, but my spirit will never leave my children and you will carry my name to thegenerations’. I guess you were right.

There’s a lot you have missed, Tata. But when I think of all the teaching and the hugs, I feel so close to you.

Till we meet again; I will always love you, Ellie

Ellie Kisyombe is the founder of Ellie’s Kitchen Home Edition and of Our Table Dublin, a social enterprise highlighting problems in the direct provision system, and creating opportunities for people to celebrate food, learn cooking skills, and gain employment. This month, Ellie is celebrating Refugee Week 2021.

Sharon Shannon

Dear Daddy, When I received this postcard in August 2020, I treasured it then every bit as I do now.

By now, you probably have the privilege of knowing all the answers to the puzzles and mysteries of life and death, about which the rest of us spend our lifetime wondering.

I have read that all of the amazing and phenomenal things we enjoy here on Earth — the most breathtaking scenery, music, craic, and belly laughs — are all just a bad imitation of the beauty and the high vibes that you have there in Heaven. If that place really exists, it gives me enormous comfort to know that you are there. It goes without saying that I miss you every day. I miss all the fun and adventures that we had. But it eases my mind knowing that you’re now free from the aching, feeble, and failing body in which you struggled to live for the last five or six years, and that you are able to dance and sing again with Mammy Shannon in the company of your long-lost relatives, friends, and the many animals that you loved so much. Please keep me posted with your heavenly activities. I will be watching out for all your little signs.