Ask Audrey: The Russians wouldn't want to get that close to Kanturk

There’s a new Russian hanging around the town and isn’t Berna after getting it into her head that he’s some class of spy

Ask Audrey has been sorting Cork people out for ages.

It’s getting cosmetic on our WhatsApp group, Douglas Road Stunners Who Haven’t Aged a Minute Since the Start of the Pandemic. Orla_5grandChin kicked it all off on Tuesday when she told us that the hot bar-tender in her fav cocktail spot didn’t flirt with her last Saturday night, even though her jumpsuit cost more than his annual salary. Three Mojitos later, didn’t she ask him why he wouldn’t give her the eye, and he said, sorry girl, you’re older than I thought, now that you have the mask off. Fifi_BackFromMartinique said only two guys hit on her in Barry’s during the Munster match on Sunday, and one of them was from Carrigaline. It seems like we’ve all crossed into early middle-aged-woman-face during the last two years and anything we try now will make us look like a cougar. To make matters worse, Emer Cronin-Buckley was spotted out on Saturday night and isn’t the bee-atch after getting a whole new set of cheekbones over in Dubai. Worse again, My Ken is after following her on Instagram and there’s a bit of history there. So Audrey, I was wondering, could you have word with the powers that be and ask them to bring back all the restrictions until I sort out a bit of work on my nose? 

- Jenni, Douglas Road.