Rory's Stories: My wife became pregnant after we moved in with my parents

Rory O'Connor is taking part in Focus Ireland and Bord Gáis Energy’s Shine A Light Night initiative on October 15 by sleeping out in his garden with his family to raise funds towards services preventing families in Ireland from becoming homeless, whilst creating sustainable long-term solutions to homelessness in Ireland

I am from Ashbourne, Co Meath, and married with three kids — Ella, Zach, and Lucy. My wife, Emma, and I have been going out with each other since 2005. She has the patience of a saint as you can imagine. She's definitely the boss in the house, I've no problem admitting that. She needs to keep me and the kids on the straight and narrow.

We were renting for seven years. The landlord sold the house and we had to move out. There was nowhere really to rent at all in the area so we had to move in with my parents. It was very cosy to say the least. My wife fell pregnant while we were there as well and, my god, the stress of having to pick the right moment to tell my parents!

I do think I was born to be the person I am. I always had this feeling inside of me, that I was born to do something good, it just took a lot of ups and downs and a lot of highs and lows, and a lot of failure to realise what my role was in the world. I have definitely found it now. I feel like I'm on the right track and it's a lovely feeling when you're in that headspace where you know this is what you're meant to do. 

But, it did take a lot of years. A lot of down years. I was really bad at a lot of things until I found the comedy and the well-being stuff that I do now.

I'm proud of what I've achieved, a lot of people probably would have quit at many of the obstacles I faced over the years, whether it be, my videos getting abuse online or comedy gigs not selling tickets, or people not enjoying them. I've no proper Leaving Cert, I did the LCA, I can't really spell. I'd be ADHD, dyslexic, all these things, but I am still getting the best out of myself and that's why I like doing a lot of talks for school kids just to say 'Listen, you're alright, don't be afraid to fail, it's okay'.

The greatest challenge I’ve faced was asking for help. That was tough. It's such a leap of faith because of the stigma attached to mental health, you don't want to accept that you need help, but I did and that was a tough challenge but if I didn't ask for help, there would be no such thing as Rory's Stories.

I don't often give myself a pat on the back, but I am very proud of the three books. I'd be the last person my school teachers would have said would write a book.

I'd like to be remembered as somebody who inspired people to do stuff that they thought they couldn't do. I think my best quality is that I am good at handling adversity, but I had to learn that, I had to fail a lot.

The people I turn to would be my wife or my dad — chalk and cheese, but they're the two people I'd turn to when I am struggling. It’s still difficult to say I am depressed or to say my anxiety is through the roof, it doesn’t get any easier. But I'm more aware of it now and when it passes, I generally talk about it then. When it's in my head, I do kind of go into a little bit of a shell, but if I ever need proper help I will ask. For me personally, the key thing is knowing it will pass. I know it will pass and if it doesn't pass, I know the help is there.

The lesson I'd like to pass on would be that failure and fear are good. At the end of the day you have to fail to learn about yourself, and if you have fear, it means it means something to you. Stepping out of our comfort zone is horrible, our brain tells us, no, no, get back into that cosy bed and get the hot water bottle, but you find out the most about yourself when you're outside your comfort zone — when you're in unfamiliar territory and everyone is telling you to stop moving forward. I think that's when you learn the most about yourself.

The greatest advice I’ve ever gotten was from Paddy Houlihan. He’s a friend of mine and plays Dermot in Mrs Brown's Boys. When I was starting Rory's Stories, he said to me, always remember that if there's 100 people in a room and 60 think you're brilliant and 40 think you're absolutely shite, you're winning. In other words, you're never going to please everyone, but if you're pleasing the majority of people then you're winning.

I am scared of not fulfilling my potential. I think every human being has the potential to be out of this world. Katie Taylor, Oprah Winfrey, Cristiano Ronaldo — I think all human beings have that capability if we just find what we're good at and what we enjoy doing. Finding it is the hardest thing. The advice I give to people is when you do find what you enjoy doing, don't listen to anyone else, just listen to your gut feeling and work as hard as you can. That's where success comes from. And as McGregor says, if your dreams don't scare you, they're not big enough.

• Rory is taking part in Focus Ireland and Bord Gáis Energy’s Shine A Light Night initiative on October 15 by sleeping out in his garden with his family to raise funds for services preventing families in Ireland from becoming homeless, whilst creating sustainable long-term solutions to homelessness in Ireland.