Talk To Me: My husband wants to stay at home when we retire but I want to travel 

Psychologist Caroline Martin is here to answer your questions on whatever issues you are dealing with in life, from work pressure and stress to loneliness and grief

The Disneyfication of the complex stage of retirement does not help prepare us for the tough conversations that are often necessary

My husband and I are due to retire in a year. I can’t wait to start my new life, but all he wants to do is work in the garden or his shed. I’ve told him I don’t intend to stay at home, cooking meals and keeping the place clean, which didn’t go down well. It would be wonderful if we could travel together, but it looks like I will have to go alone. I feel frightened and guilty at the same time. Our children are raised and have families of their own, so there is no reason to stay put.

Type ‘retirement planning’ into your search engine and your screen will be awash with financial organisations offering insights into providing for your pension and tools for projecting your cost of living. What you don’t often see are the very real numbers of those married couples who decide to go their separate ways once the reality of retirement and conflicting visions emerge.